It’s May Already? Seriously Where Does the Time Go?

I can’t believe it’s May already…time is just flying by. We’re in the midst of spring in the Pacific Northwest and I’m thinking about the warm months to come. Here we are into the 5th month of the year already. Timing is everything. Time changes every time we blink. Blink too often and time is changed for good.

Time passes whether we’re working on our dream or dreaming our days away in a place where we never make a difference and we’re never appreciated. Time is too short. We never have enough time to do the things we want unless we clear away our time to do the things we want. These are the things I’ve heard since I was parted from my job in March.

Some have talked about how a job loss is like a death, and it can be devastating to a family. My husband asked me last week about what May have changed in my health since I am not in a job that caused me immense stress. Here are some changes that occurred within this month. My hair stopped falling out, it got to the point where I was losing clumps of hair in the shower. Yes, stress does that to me. I rarely lose a strand now. I am so much more relaxed now. I’m not stress eating anymore, and I’m able to sleep a full night instead of waking up at 2 with that feeling like I’m really the failure my boss kept telling me I was.

That kind of stress has the potential to not only kill someone’s spirit but also their very cells. Every morning I felt myself dying a little bit more every time I turned on my work computer. I no longer had the motivation to talk to anyone about the products we offered or the benefits we had. I just couldn’t see my way out of this hole….But God had a plan for me and prepared the way out for me that was both liberating and life giving.

One of my talented students took this photo with his iPad. He’s got such a wonderful eye for nature!

What do I do with my time now? I am a specialized tutor for K20 students who need extra help. Students who have Individualized Education Plans who need help in core subjects and life skills. This is my niche and really has always been my niche. I built this mini business without a website, without business cards, without a brand logo. My services speak for themselves, and word-of-mouth is the cheapest form of advertising. My dad always said, “Do a good job in any business and you’ll never be without.”

When is the time to start something new? NOW. It goes along with YES. If you’re asked to do something and say yes to it, do it Now. Don’t wait. Time is always fleeting. Don’t wait till tomorrow, tomorrow will have its own challenges and triumphs waiting to be fulfilled. We’ll never get another chance like today. It’s May 2018. Lets make it the best May of our lives. Let’s make the most of the time we have this month so we won’t be asking “Where did the time go?” when June hits.

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IT’S BEEN A LONG TIME COMING

I must admit, I too am part of the group of people who sometimes lets the circumstances of life get to her. Let’s face it we all have days and sometimes weeks where we get down and need to take some time to regroup and regather our thoughts. That’s what this time away has been for me. It’s been a long time coming with what I’ve been dealing with these last few months.

So many times I think we always feel the need to keep going no matter what happens in our lives, that we lose focus of what’s really important to us. We can get up every morning and still have the same feelings of the day before if we don’t deal with them before we go to bed.

Last week I heard a message from John Maxwell and then something similar from Rick Warren about how it doesn’t matter how much you can get done in a day. What matters most is how much have you imitated God in a day. Last week I wrote “Was I an imitator of God today?” and posted it on the wall that I see first thing in the morning and in my bathroom where it is the last thing I see before retiring at night.

Was I am imitator of God today

I don’t find the answers to this question in my list of things to do. I find the answers to this question from my prayers for the people in my life and even my  enemies,the smiles I give to strangers, the helping hand I give to someone in need, the uplifting words I used throughout the day, the forgiveness I give to people who have hurt me (and continue to hurt me), the ability to turn the other cheek when accusations are hurled at me, standing up for the truth of God, the compassion I show, and the love that I show to all people I come into contact with. 

I stopped making a to-do list and started concentrating on this question each day.  When I was in school and had to read a large section of text for assignments I would read through the questions at the end of the sections, because it made me focus more on the answers when they presented themselves. So when I read the question “Was I an imitator of God today?”in the morning, it opens me up to opportunities where I can imitate God with the talents He gave me.

I’m not saying that just reading the question will make things happen, you have to have faith and be willing to put yourself to the side to  learn how to live God’s way of life. You can’t imitate anyone unless you know them. So in order to know God you need to read His Word. Study His Word. Meditate on His Word and Pray.

So while it’s been a long time coming, it has been a time where I regrouped and refocused my thoughts to what’s really important for me.

To quote a famous coach, Vince Lombardi, and the CEO of Yahoo, Marissa Mayer:

“God, family, and everything else; in that order!”

TIP #10: HANDMADE

Who doesn’t like a gift that’s handmade? I love receiving gifts that are handmade because it shows that the giver really put their time and energy into the gift. They made this gift with me in mind. If you give handmade gifts you know that these gifts save money, because you’ve only had to pay for the supplies and not the craftsmanship hours to make it.

I love giving handmade gifts. About 7 years ago I told my husband that from now on I would give a homemade gift to my friends and families for birthdays, anniversaries, graduations, baby showers, bridal showers and other times when a gift would be appropriate. I use my talents as a skilled crocheter to make blankets for newborns. I’ve used my cooking skills to make up food for people who come home from surgery, I’ve even used my keen eye to help people who are color blind to put together clothing outfits out of the clothes in their closets.

Instead of just running out to purchase a nonsense gift for your next gift giving occasion, why not use the talents you have to give them something they will cherish forever. Even more make a commitment to only give gifts that are handmade by you.

Don’t think you have a talent worth giving here are some gifts that would be greatly appreciated.

  • Clean someone house for them.
  • Record yourself reading books for your grandchildren
  • Record yourself playing or singing a favorite song
  • Wash their car
  • Mow your friend’s lawn
  • Make up a special dinner
  • Type out some interesting quotes
  • Get your friends together and give a special spa day you all do yourself.

While these are some simple things you can do that say “I took time to think about you.” They may be small in comparison to a store-bought gift but they mean so much more. When we spend our time and energy on other people not only do we save money, but we bridge the gap of love. 

DAY 7: A BUSY LIFE

Just because life becomes busier, I am still on the path to a changed life in 28 days. Yes, the phone is growing out of my ear and I have less time to do what I want but this busy life is temporary.

“What else am I going to do with my time?”

busy-life

I wrote in previous installments how time is fleeting, but I truly believe that when people use the excuse“I don’t have the time” whenever someone wants to talk to them whether about important or frivolous things what they are really saying is “just leave me alone.” Is this how we should be to our friends, to people who might hold the key to your future? I don’t think so.

One of my favorite comebacks to people who tell me they don’t have time to listen to me, or even entertain my ideas because of a lack of their time is this:

“You know what’s funny is if you want something done, you have to find a busy person to do it. Busy people have the most connections and get the most done, you know it and I know it. If you’re saying this to blow me off, it’s totally cool, but if you think my ideas require a huge amount of time, you’re wrong.”

There are always going to be busy people in our lives, whether it’s us or someone we’re trying to make a connection with. Sometimes people also use this “I’m too busy” “I don’t have the time” as fear mechanism. They fear you are going to interject an idea that is so radical to their way of thinking that they may have to change their perception, and they’re afraid. So they say “I’m too busy” in hopes that you will simply walk away.

How many times has a parent said this to their children when the children just want to show what they made, give a hug, or simply express their love? When children hear “Not now, I’m too busy” enough times they stop trying to make a connection with the parent. These are the children who seek emotional support from outside peer groups.

These two statements are used so often in relationships that we’ve all heard them many times from best friends, spouses, parents, teachers, coaches, the list endless. What is the harm in putting down what you are so absorbed in to listen and connect with that other person?

Think about this the next time you use the words “I’m too busy!” “I don’t have the time!”

We have all make time for the things that matter most to us!

If you’ve read this blog long enough, you know my health rates at the top of my TIME list, so does my family and all the connections I make throughout my day.

It’s time for a change!

50 AND COUNTING

Monday marked my 50th birthday. It came and went without a thought…yeah right! When does a milestone birthday go by without a thought? NEVER! Yes, I’m 50 and counting! I celebrated this day with my husband and a few close friends. Got many phone calls from my family and Facebook birthday wishes. Then yesterday it finally hit me.

Where did the time go? It seems I went to sleep at the ripe old age of 21 and woke up at 50. Time is so fleeting, yet it’s the thing we waste the most. In my 50 years of life, I’ve accomplished many things. I married my high school sweetheart. I raised four wonderful sons. I graduated from college. I helped many people along the way. But never in my wildest dreams did I ever think I would wake up one day and be 50.

When I was a kid, I thought 50 was old. I thought my parents were ancient when they were 50. After all my mom was 50 when I was only 14. Then yesterday a good friend of mine, who’s a bit older than me, asked me how I felt now that I’m 50. I feel no different than when I was 49. What’s really interesting is that I feel no different than when I was 29. In my head I still see myself as that naive young woman of 21 who had her whole future ahead of her.

I still have my future ahead of me, we all do. There is no magic age when a person is old. It’s all how you feel. I feel young. I’m healthy. I’m not on any prescriptions. Not one joint is creaking in my body. I’m more energetic now than I was when I was in my 20’s.

Young at Heart

It’s just like the old Jimmy Durante song (If You’re) Young at Heart. My fairy tales can still come true, because I’m young at heart. I can still laugh when my dreams fall apart at their seams, because I know that there’s excitement in each new day. Yes I still have dreams and I still have goals, some are the same I’ve had for years, but I know in my heart I can accomplish them.

Be young at heart and you’ll never grow old!

10 TIPS TO MEANINGFUL DAYS

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10 TIPS TO MEANINGFUL DAYS

  • Choose the right attitude According to renowned author John C. Maxwell, we should “choose and display the right attitude”. Our attitude is a choice we make every minute of every day; it’s what we bring with us into every situation we have. Look at it this way “Your attitude is like the aroma of your heart. If your attitude stinks, what’s in your heart?” (Facing the Giants)
  • Eat Healthy When we take in the proper nutrients through our food our minds work better, we think more clearly, and are not apt to make rash judgments. That jelly filled donut and coffee you have every day on the way to work only spikes your blood pressure and shoots your insulin levels up. It does not wake you up but gives you that mid-morning crash.
  • Make time for the family When my children were in school I worked for a company that had flex time, which means I was able to make my own hours as long as I was at the office for at least 5 hours during business hours. This gave me the opportunity to start my day at 5:00 am which means I was home before my kids got home from school. I was able to make every track meet, basketball game, band concert and mid-afternoon school parties. You have our whole life to work; your children are only with you for 18-20 short years make them count. For those without children, spend time with your nephews and nieces,  call your parents weekly, connect with your siblings.
  • Acknowledge someone for going above and beyond Our society has become a society that gives out awards for waking up in the morning. We have lost that work ethic that was once present all around us. No more can our teachers fail a student for not doing his or her homework now it’s okay just to show up “you get an A; you made it here!” It’s been said that 80% of the work is done by 20% of the people. I don’t agree with that; now it’s like 1% of the people do the work and 99% of the people want to reap the rewards. Acknowledge those people that actually do the work, they deserve it.
  • Learn something today In Leo Buscaglia’s book Papa My Father, Leo talks about his father who even though had a limited education instilled an evening ritual for his family. Before dinner everyone had to share something they learned new that day. Before you sit down for your evening meal or if you eat lunch with your co-workers ask each other “what did you learn new today?”You might be surprised at the outcome.
  • Be on time Most people don’t understand when you arrive late to an appointment not only do you show disrespect for the other person you’re meeting, you show an “I don’t care attitude”. Legendary coach Vince Lombardi would tell his players if you’re here on time you’re already late. Lombardi Time states “Show up for every important business meeting 15 minutes ahead of the scheduled meeting time.” The idea is to use the 15 minutes to catch your breath, collect your thoughts and plan what you want to accomplish in the meeting and how you’ll go about it.
  • Be a “YES” person We have been programmed from a baby to say “NO”. “Do you want to buy” are words that make all of us cringe. Usually when someone asks us a question, our minds are ready to say the word “NO” before the person finishes the question. Say “YES” to listening to the whole proposal before making up your mind. If you close your mind too early you won’t hear the possibilities.
  • “Don’t sweat the small stuff”The first chapter in Richard Carlson, PH.D. book by the same title. He states “Often we allow ourselves to get all worked up about things that, upon closer examination, aren’t really that big a deal.” You know that person that just cut you off on the way to work, you don’t have to chase them down and get back even with them. Let them go, don’t make their problems yours. When we allow all the small stuff to build up we find we have bigger problems.
  • Don’t worry about things you can’t control You get an email early in the morning from your boss secretary “the Boss wants to meet with you at 3:00 this afternoon”. You start to panic, what did I do, are there going to be cutback, am I going to get fired, what do I tell my wife and kids. Our minds play through many scenarios, in fact your boss only want to congratulate you on a job well done on the last project. We worry about everything. Worry makes you physical sick. Really it’s exhausting. Let go like water off a ducks back, you’ll be better for it!
  • Be chivalrous When was the last time you did something “just because”. Hold the door open for a stranger, allow them to step in line ahead of you because they only had 3 ideas and you had a cart full. We live in a “ME” society, me first the hell with the rest of you. My wife and I raised 4 sons as Modern-day Knights, thinking of the well being of other people first.  That person you just held the door open for was having the worst day of his or her life and you just made it better. An act of chivalry only costs time, but the reward lasts forever.

I want to thank my husband, Joe Jacoby for writing this blog post, it means so much to me to have his love and support each and every day we are together. His support and guidance helps me make each of my days count.

10 MINUTES

Replace 10 minutes of television or computer time with an 10 minutes of activity.

It is often said that American’s spend too much time in front of the boob tube or on their electronic devices. This is one reason why American children are getting heavier with each generation. When we were raising our children I used to have them earn their privileges for watching TV or their computer time by reading books. For each book read in they earned 15 to 30 minutes depending on how long the book was.

So I thought I would use this technique on myself. Only now I do it in reverse. There are only a handful of shows on television worth watching for me, and we only have regular television. So I only watch television to see any of Gordon Ramsay’s shows and the Big Bang theory, so that’s only 4 ½ hours a week. My problem is that I am tied to my computer because of work and sometimes I will work for hours without getting up. So I devised a plan to make me move for 10 minutes out of every hour. I use a kitchen timer, and set it for 50 minutes. When the timer goes off, I put on my shoes and go out to the deck, water my plants, go check on the mail, walk around the block, or if it’s raining hop on You Tube and do 10 minutes of exercise. When the ten minutes is over, I set the timer again and work for another 50 minutes and do something else that involves moving my body, preferably outside when I can.

Just think in an 8-hour day, I worked out for 80 minutes.

Now I know what you’re thinking, you couldn’t possibly do this in an office building. You can because you can go into the restroom and do some stretching, or do a 10 minute desk workout, the idea is that every time you look away from your electronic devices is better for your health and your wellbeing.

Take an activity break your health will thank you!