UNEXPECTED BREAKS

My last blog post was on the 13th of January and here it is February 2nd. I felt I needed to take some time and work on  one of my challenges for the month of January. This unexpected break has helped to work on the emotional struggles I’ve been going through these last 10 months. I’m not saying that these struggles won’t rear their ugly heads yet again in my life, but now I know how to deal with them when they do.

Attitude

I’ve learned so much through this whole ordeal that I thought I would share a bit of  it here with you. If I sound like a broken record, please forgive me, I learn by repetition.

  • I can’t change the way people in my life behave but I can remove myself from situations where their anger and put-downs don’t harm my well-being.
  • Perception changes when we change.
  • We all change, no one stays the same. If we aren’t changing and growing, then we’re dying. There is no in between. Living a life in limbo is not living.
  • Therapy helps us grow, sometimes we get the feeling like we don’t fit in anymore, that’s because we’re growing beyond the group.
  • The more I tried to make peace with people who want nothing to do with peace, the more frustrated I became. You can’t make peace with people who don’t want peace. You also can’t make peace with people who only want peace on their own terms.
  • Letting go is an ongoing process; it’s not a one time deal. It’s a daily action that takes diligence,  courage, and faith (so much faith!)
  • Separating yourself from the people causing discord in your life, is sometimes the only way to heal.
  • It takes courage to stand up for yourself, the reward is a healed life.
  • Going through this struggle has made me see some traits in myself that I needed to correct, so I don’t repeat the cycle.
  • Going to God has been my best refuge and shelter. To hide away in God’s word has helped me to see that I’m not the only one who has ever gone through this kind of struggle.
  • There is no problem that is ever too big for God to handle, as long as I don’t keep taking the problem back after I’ve given it to him.
  • PATIENCE! Waiting on God and letting Him work everything out on His timetable takes a whole lot of PATIENCE!

Yes, this was an unexpected break but one that I desperately needed to recharge my batteries, and give me a change in perspective. No longer am I trapped in wrong thinking, but my mind is renewed  through the words of God that have helped cleanse me from the ill feelings that precipitated the emotional struggle that was holding me back for so many months.

Thank you dear my readers and followers for your loyalty, your patience, your love, and your encouragement during my time away.

TIP #28: LET GO OF THINGS YOU DON’T USE

I’ve had friends over the years that would pay for memberships but not use them. One such membership was to the local health club. One friend never went to the health club but was charged a fee every month for her membership. When I asked her about it once, she said that she couldn’t bring herself to cancel the membership because she might go in the future. Trust me if you have a membership to a health club and haven’t used it in a year chances are you’re never going to use it. So stop throwing money at something you’re never going to use. I was going to title this post Ditch the Health Club but the many reasons why you should keep your health club membership especially if you use it, the benefits outweigh it’s cost. But for those people who are constantly throwing money to the wind without reaping the benefits it”s time to take a serious look at where your money is going and ask yourself if you could live without it.  Let go of the things you don’t use.

health club

We had to let go of our health club membership because we couldn’t afford it. It was a difficult thing to let go of; my husband still misses it today and it’s been over a year of letting it go. So I came up with ways to stay healthy and lose weight that don’t cost nearly as much and some are even free. We all like free!

  • Join or start a walking group or just grab your kids and husband and go for a daily walk with them. 
  • If you’re a swimmer, join a swim club and compete in meets.
  • Rent or borrow exercise DVD’s from netflix, redbox, or the library
  • Use YouTube as a free exercise buddy
  • Save up for exercise equipment for your home.
  • Borrow unused exercise equipment from friends. If it’s unused they may just give it to you.
  • If you’re fortunate to live in a condo or apartment complex with its own gym use it, you’re paying for it anyway.
  • If your condo or apartment complex has stairs, run up and down the stairs.
  • Workout at the office if you have the facilities. Take lunchtime exercise classes too.
  • Spend time with your kids playing outside games: Frisbee, catch, tennis, tag, etc

These are just some areas that can help keep you healthy and help you lose weight, without spending money you simply don’t have.

LETTING GO

 

Each new school year brings parents to that awful feeling that they must endure. Letting go. Whether your children are entering school as a kindergartner or going off to college, this can be a time of anxiety for both parent and child. Below are the 10 ways I used to get through this difficult time that might help all of you moms and dads out there get through it too.

  • At the start of each new school year think about what you would also like to learn about, and do it. Not enough time or money to go back to school, no problem. The library and internet always have different ways to learn something without having to take formal classes. One year I learned all about faux painting, simple living, saving money, and even different cooking techniques.
  1. Make the first day of kindergarten a celebration, a milestone, an accomplishment. Be proud of your children as they enter this new stage. Remember if you are sad, they will be sad too.
  2. Start the first day of school off with your children’s favorite breakfast, make a good lunch for them to include a special card from you, to let them know that you are thinking about them.
  3. When they return from school, make them your focus. Ask them questions that require more than just “yes” and “no” answers.
  4. If the strain of being away from your children is too great, volunteer at your children’s school. I did this and it turned into a part-time job, which evolved into a full time job.
  5. Take the time they are in school to concentrate on tasks that are just too difficult to do with them home. For me that was grocery shopping, painting, organizing, or even reading a book of my choice.
  6. College aged children is another milestone, and another sad, growth  moment in a parent’s life. But it can be just as liberating for the parents as it is for the children if thought of as a natural progression of life.
  7. Sign up for college too. That’s what I did. As my sons went off to college, I went to college too. This way I had less time to feel sorry for myself.
  8. Join a book group, or create one yourself.
  9. Take in classes at the local art museums, or go to seminars offered at local health food stores. (These are things I did) Be in tune to your interests and go from there.
  10. Be ready to share what you are learning with you grown children, it will help them to realize that you are indeed letting go and letting them become adults instead of holding them back to be our little children.

While our sons will  always remain babies in my heart, they have grown into fine young men. All because I learned to let go, my way.