Being Ready For What Comes Next

So it’s January and I’m again following the 50 Day Cleanse. I’m on day 16 of it. I’ve lost another 6 pounds. I’ve eliminated the calluses and dry skin from my feet and hands. I can smell and taste so much better. I’m no longer tied to taking digestive enzymes and probiotics to aid my digestion. My craving for sugar and even sweet fruits are all gone. Now I eat for the sake of nourishment instead of feeding a craving. I’m still making yummy foods and smoothies (Working on a raw food smoothie book right now). I also am finding out that my countenance or rather my control grows stronger by the day. If you’re following my progress on our Facebook group, then you know what I’m talking about. The plan gets easier when we work the plan. I am not so much concerned with making sure everyday I eat in a set window of time. I eat during a four or five-hour window, but it all depends on when I’m hungry enough for that window to begin. And I never eat after 6 pm. But what does it mean to be ready for what’s next?

Being ready for what comes next means different things to different people. To me it’s making peace to whatever may come my way. I have a favorite quote up on my office wall. It’s from a Swedish diplomat, economist, and author, Dag Hammarskjold.

For all that has been, thanks. For all that will be yes.

I love this quote because it resonates with what I’ve been thinking and praying about. Living in gratitude is more that just being thankful for all we’ve got and experiences we’ve had. It means being thankful for what comes next. Being ready for the next surprise, being open to the next adventure, accepting the next challenge, saying “YES” to something that would normally get a “NO!” These are ways of accepting what comes next. It could mean a job loss, it could mean learning through a new trial in life. To me this quote also means you’re not going to sit and let life pass you by. You’re going to get uncomfortable for a while. It’s in our uncomfortableness where we grow the most.

This 50 Day Cleanse has much to do with expanding our thinking, moving into a new mindset, and a new healthy lifestyle. Yes, it takes courage, control, change, overcoming, and vision. But through all this you will gain a better, healthier version of yourself.

Are you ready for what comes next?

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THE MORE YOU CHANGE THE LESS YOU FIT IN

I remember when I started talking with a therapist; twelve years ago is when I truly began to change the way I think and the way I act. Because of the job I had, I was not able to talk to my family or friends about the atrocities I witnessed nor could I fully process the information I was given at the time. Talking to a therapist helped me get things in perspective. I also learned much about myself. I became aware that as I was changing I felt I was no longer able to fit into the mold that everyone placed me in.

change

Change is good, it’s what we’re supposed to be doing so we grow in knowledge, in grace, and in understanding. The problem with change is that the more you do it the more people around you resist your change. The people in your life don’t want you to change; they want you to stay in that neat little box so they can control you. But that’s not how life works. We all need to change, not just a specific “chosen” few. Just because we don’t fit into someone else’s neat little box and conform to their idea of how we should be the rest of our lives doesn’t mean we are not worthy of changing.

I’ve spent many years being the person  my parents raised me to be, then I tried being the wife I thought my husband wanted me to be. In doing this I put my own wants, desires, and dreams on the back burner and never looked at them again. I acted the way people around me wanted me to act. I spoke in ways that people around me thought I should speak. But this year a profound change in my occurred.  I found my voice. The little changes that were stirred up inside of me from that first encounter with a wonderful therapist, began changing me from the inside out. I am no longer that shy person to put in a box and hide in a closet. I’m no longer that person who ignores injustice, even when it’s in her own family.

I don’t fit into people’s little box anymore. As a matter of fact I’ve grown so far beyond any box that sometimes I just don’t fit in, period. But life’s not about fitting in, it’s about changing. Life’s about caring for others enough to encourage and accept change in them. Many people in my own family don’t like who I’ve become (they can’t control me anymore), so they just go on to judge me and say “That’s not the real, Laura!” Well they don’t know who the real Laura is, because they haven’t taken the time to sit down and talk to me. If you want to get to know the new real Laura, call me, talk to me, because this Laura is in a constant state of change.

Change is good. The more you change the less you fit in, and the less you fit in the more you change. Don’t let the stagnancy of this world hold you down. Just continue the journey of changing to be the best version of you you can be.

Life’s not about fitting in, life is about being who God wants you to be.

4 POUNDS LOST

Day 4:

Had fun while in the grocery store yesterday. While I walked through the bakery section I looked at my hips telling them “you don’t need anymore padding.” Then I turned my head and saw a pretty rose that I bought for myself.

Yellow Roses - my Favorite

Yellow Roses – my Favorite 

I bought some broccoli and cauliflower, then headed to poultry section. Since I am one of those people who always plans meals around what’s in the discount bin, I thought I’d look there first, nothing I would eat only red meat. Chickens were on sale so I bought 3 whole chickens, and a pound of ground chicken. Had the ground chicken last night with the broccoli and cauliflower. Made Chicken meatballs with ground sunflower seeds and flax seeds; I roasted the broccoli and cauliflower together with some garlic.

Also had one of my moments, when I was staring at a bag of taco chips wanting them really bad. I phoned a friend, he talked me through it by asking me what type of stress I was dealing with. Then asked me if I needed to set the right example for other people in my house. Boy do I ever. I need to be strong. He asked if I had anything else in the house I could eat instead. I did, I found some walnuts in the freezer. I got off the phone and sat down still staring at the chips and eating my walnuts.

Dragon Slayed

Dragon Slayed

Then I took the bag of chips, crushed them to smithereens and poured them into the garbage can. It’s a liberating feeling to know that I have control over what goes into my mouth.

Day 5:

Got on the scale today, lost 4 pounds.

Tried on some smaller clothes, and my smaller, skinny jeans fit. I am so thrilled. That I felt

like celebrating. So I fixed myself a good breakfast, 2 sunny side up eggs, some oats, and a nice cup of chamomile tea. Sat down at my breakfast table and read three chapters in my new book while nibbling this scrumptious meal.

10 TIPS TO MEANINGFUL DAYS

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10 TIPS TO MEANINGFUL DAYS

  • Choose the right attitude According to renowned author John C. Maxwell, we should “choose and display the right attitude”. Our attitude is a choice we make every minute of every day; it’s what we bring with us into every situation we have. Look at it this way “Your attitude is like the aroma of your heart. If your attitude stinks, what’s in your heart?” (Facing the Giants)
  • Eat Healthy When we take in the proper nutrients through our food our minds work better, we think more clearly, and are not apt to make rash judgments. That jelly filled donut and coffee you have every day on the way to work only spikes your blood pressure and shoots your insulin levels up. It does not wake you up but gives you that mid-morning crash.
  • Make time for the family When my children were in school I worked for a company that had flex time, which means I was able to make my own hours as long as I was at the office for at least 5 hours during business hours. This gave me the opportunity to start my day at 5:00 am which means I was home before my kids got home from school. I was able to make every track meet, basketball game, band concert and mid-afternoon school parties. You have our whole life to work; your children are only with you for 18-20 short years make them count. For those without children, spend time with your nephews and nieces,  call your parents weekly, connect with your siblings.
  • Acknowledge someone for going above and beyond Our society has become a society that gives out awards for waking up in the morning. We have lost that work ethic that was once present all around us. No more can our teachers fail a student for not doing his or her homework now it’s okay just to show up “you get an A; you made it here!” It’s been said that 80% of the work is done by 20% of the people. I don’t agree with that; now it’s like 1% of the people do the work and 99% of the people want to reap the rewards. Acknowledge those people that actually do the work, they deserve it.
  • Learn something today In Leo Buscaglia’s book Papa My Father, Leo talks about his father who even though had a limited education instilled an evening ritual for his family. Before dinner everyone had to share something they learned new that day. Before you sit down for your evening meal or if you eat lunch with your co-workers ask each other “what did you learn new today?”You might be surprised at the outcome.
  • Be on time Most people don’t understand when you arrive late to an appointment not only do you show disrespect for the other person you’re meeting, you show an “I don’t care attitude”. Legendary coach Vince Lombardi would tell his players if you’re here on time you’re already late. Lombardi Time states “Show up for every important business meeting 15 minutes ahead of the scheduled meeting time.” The idea is to use the 15 minutes to catch your breath, collect your thoughts and plan what you want to accomplish in the meeting and how you’ll go about it.
  • Be a “YES” person We have been programmed from a baby to say “NO”. “Do you want to buy” are words that make all of us cringe. Usually when someone asks us a question, our minds are ready to say the word “NO” before the person finishes the question. Say “YES” to listening to the whole proposal before making up your mind. If you close your mind too early you won’t hear the possibilities.
  • “Don’t sweat the small stuff”The first chapter in Richard Carlson, PH.D. book by the same title. He states “Often we allow ourselves to get all worked up about things that, upon closer examination, aren’t really that big a deal.” You know that person that just cut you off on the way to work, you don’t have to chase them down and get back even with them. Let them go, don’t make their problems yours. When we allow all the small stuff to build up we find we have bigger problems.
  • Don’t worry about things you can’t control You get an email early in the morning from your boss secretary “the Boss wants to meet with you at 3:00 this afternoon”. You start to panic, what did I do, are there going to be cutback, am I going to get fired, what do I tell my wife and kids. Our minds play through many scenarios, in fact your boss only want to congratulate you on a job well done on the last project. We worry about everything. Worry makes you physical sick. Really it’s exhausting. Let go like water off a ducks back, you’ll be better for it!
  • Be chivalrous When was the last time you did something “just because”. Hold the door open for a stranger, allow them to step in line ahead of you because they only had 3 ideas and you had a cart full. We live in a “ME” society, me first the hell with the rest of you. My wife and I raised 4 sons as Modern-day Knights, thinking of the well being of other people first.  That person you just held the door open for was having the worst day of his or her life and you just made it better. An act of chivalry only costs time, but the reward lasts forever.

I want to thank my husband, Joe Jacoby for writing this blog post, it means so much to me to have his love and support each and every day we are together. His support and guidance helps me make each of my days count.