How many times have you thought or said something that sounds just like what would come out of your mother’s or father’s mouth? I used to hear myself talking or yelling at my kids and just stop because I sounded just like my own mom, when she yelled at me. She yelled at me more times than I care to remember. I think the inheritance we give our children is filled with our faults as well as our attributes. When we think of an inheritance we usually think about wealth, land, and family heirlooms but our words hold our inheritance too.
There have been numerous times when we compare our children to ourselves and ourselves to our own parents by our behaviors. Telling our children they are acting just like their father or mother when they misbehave will instill in them that it’s okay to act out in a negative way. This negative behavior is carried with them into adulthood and it becomes a part of who they are to the point of being a fault but not knowing how to stop the behavior.
Yes, we inherit the faults and attributes of our parents, but it doesn’t mean that we can’t build upon what we inherit. If we inherit land or wealth from our parents do we just let it go into ruin like we do when we inherit their faults? No we protect it, we invest it, and we find ways to keep the inheritance growing so we can pass it down to our own children. So why do we let the faults of our parents eat us away and destroy that which is good in us?
Many times I think “Oh what’s the use, it’s never going to work out.” These are the exact words my mom used to tell me whenever I was designing a new dress, sweater, or pattern for my own clothes. I have to make a constant effort to stop that thought, because it destroys any hope of doing anything that I set my mind to. It creates negativity. I also have a constant battle going on in my mind because my father’s words are also there too. But his words were always softer to me and whole lot more positive. His words, “You can do anything you set your mind to!” “I knew you could do it!” “Don’t let anyone steal your thunder!” My father was always encouraging me to be the best me possible. But it’s interesting that the negative is what I hear loud and clear in my head over the positive. Only when I consciously push the negative words of my mother out of my head is when I can hear my father’s encouraging words.
There are people in our lives who sit back and can’t remember a time when their own parents encouraged them. This is a sad inheritance to bestow on children. This lack of encouragement gets passed down to their children and their grandchildren. We need to remember that our words come from our hearts and minds. If we don’t control our minds and speak positively to our children we are giving them an inheritance of pain, misery, confusion, and chaos.
Proverbs 13:22 “The good leave an inheritance to their children’s children, but the sinner’s wealth is laid up for the righteous.”
If you want to children’s children to have a good heart and mind, you must mind your words today.
Stop yelling at them. Encourage them.
Stop using sarcasm. Encourage them.
Stop swearing at them. Encourage them.
Praise them. Encourage them.
Encourage them. Encourage them.